The Charmer

putting up a front to be safe, I go through great pains to be charming

Symbols

Sparrow, Fox, Magnolia Tree, Magnolia Flowers, House, Early Spring, Night

Keywords

Beauty: aesthetics, style, taste, fashion, refinement, charm, fascination, affectation, seduction, flattery, vanity, perfectionism, keeping up appearances, facade, superficiality

Caution: careful, vigilant, watchful, discretion, restraint, fear of ridicule or embarrassment, concerned about what others think or feel, shyness, being guarded, nice or pleasing, pushover

Agreement: approval, esteem, manners, being considerate or appropriate, likeable, suitable, fitting, sweetheart, not disagreeing, hiding one's real feelings or pain

Examples

Movie Clips & Videos:

the sweetest voice – Forrest Gump

scene from Yes Man

Joel meeting Clementine – Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

A Wise Rose – A Little Chaos,
Why Maggie Runs Away - Therapist reacts to Runaway Bride,
The Charms of Unavailable People,
Bird of Paradise Seduction Dance

"[The anima woman] may have no deeper motive than eagerness to please, to do what is expected of her, to fulfill another person's ideal of her. This other person is usually a man. She rarely stops to ask what she herself wants of how she feels.... Her actions and their results have no connection. She cannot see herself as a whole."

– M. Esther Harding, The Way of All Women

Podcasts:
Aphrodite's Shadow: Drowning in Beauty – This Jungian Life,
Half-Baked Stories About My Dead Mom (#3 Fabric) –This American Life
The Beauty Puzzle – Radiolab

Songs:
You're Beautiful (Ada)

Writings:
So I Can Fly Far Away, The Inevitability of Facing Ourselves,
Why Perfectionism Kills Love, Why Beauty Matters,
The Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women,
10 Signs You May Be a Pushover and What To Do About It,
The Absent Father Effect on Daughters,
Why Are You Keeping Up Appearances?

"The Ghostly Lover always acts as one who lures his victims away from reality by promises of bliss in another world. In the woman's psychology he is the counterpart to the siren in the man's. In the man's psychology, as in mythology, the siren by her music and charm lures the man to a watery grave. The Ghostly Lover, by the promise of untold bliss, entices the woman to seek his arms in the air.

Such a fantasy inevitably stands between the girl and all the boys and men she meets. It is as though her acquaintances have an unseen rival whom they must surpass before they can hope to win her attention."

– M. Esther Harding, The Way of All Women